2019 Librarian Lump of Coal Gift Guide
Time is running out to get a gift for the insufferable librarian in your life. With help from Etsy, the 2019 edition of the Librarian Lump of Coal Gift Guide has your back.
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For the librarian who hates germs
No Coughing Germaphobe Librarian Ostinato – Pinback Button 1.25″D round – One of a Kind
$2.00
Consider for a moment, the design of this button. What the heck, I ask you, is going on with this thing?
For the librarian who needs glasses
Vintage Women’s Half Eye Librarian Style Oval Clear Frame Reading Glasses 1960’s 1970’s!
$32.00
“How do you think we should entice people to buy these old glasses?”
“I’m thinking maybe on a creepy mannequin head with the name Tammie on the neck?”
“Should we put the glasses on the mannequin head correctly?”
“No, no – make them oddly askew.”
For the librarian who believes we are not alone in the universe
Download email gift card for Librarians with Aliens images
$1.40
All I can say is “???”
For the librarian who needs three books
Book Lover, Book Lovers, Books, Book, Book Lover Gift Set, Librarian Gift
$46.00
Wait, wait – you’re telling me I can have not one, but THREE mysteriously stained books for only $46.00???
For the lazy librarian
Coasting- The Lazy Librarian’s Guide To ‘Work’
$2.69
Actually, I bet this one is pretty funny.
For the librarian who needs some time alone
$15.16
For the librarian who might like books too much
$7.20
For the librarian who wants to shush people, but in a creepy way
Papercraft 3d, Paper trophy, Low poly papercraft, Library decor
$16.04
“He shushed me, and then disappeared into the wall.”
It’s the library equivalent of this Homer Simpson meme:
For the librarian who needs a mug
Public library Davenport Iowa cup
$10.00
“Siri, what’s the best way to sell a library mug on Etsy?”
“Tipped on its side on a paper plate.”
Filed under: Articles
About Travis Jonker
Travis Jonker is an elementary school librarian in Michigan. He writes reviews (and the occasional article or two) for School Library Journal and is a member of the 2014 Caldecott committee. You can email Travis at scopenotes@gmail.com, or follow him on Twitter: @100scopenotes.
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I *really* want to use Slugface Binbrain as an insult now.
This is a riot! Fortunately, all of the librarians I know are far from insufferable . . . but I did enjoy your Etsy-inspired suggestions. Happy Holidays and may you NEVER receive any of these in your stocking!
I love this! If I had a nickel for every time I ask a student to use their elbow I could afford that “no coughing” pin!
My wish is that no librarian (including you and me) will be gifted with any of these “insufferable” gifts! Too funny!