100 Scope Notes
Inside 100 Scope Notes

2019 Librarian Lump of Coal Gift Guide

Time is running out to get a gift for the insufferable librarian in your life. With help from Etsy, the 2019 edition of the Librarian Lump of Coal Gift Guide has your back.

Click here for the 2018 guide

Click here for the 2017 guide

Click here for the 2016 guide

Click here for the 2015 guide

Click here for the 2014 guide

Click here for the 2013 guide

Click here for the 2012 guide

Click here for the 2011 guide

Click here for the 2010 guide

For the librarian who hates germs

No Coughing Germaphobe Librarian Ostinato – Pinback Button 1.25″D round – One of a Kind

$2.00

Consider for a moment, the design of this button. What the heck, I ask you, is going on with this thing?

For the librarian who needs glasses

Vintage Women’s Half Eye Librarian Style Oval Clear Frame Reading Glasses 1960’s 1970’s!

$32.00

“How do you think we should entice people to buy these old glasses?”

“I’m thinking maybe on a creepy mannequin head with the name Tammie on the neck?”

“Should we put the glasses on the mannequin head correctly?”

“No, no – make them oddly askew.”

For the librarian who believes we are not alone in the universe

Download email gift card for Librarians with Aliens images

$1.40

All I can say is “???”

For the librarian who needs three books

Book Lover, Book Lovers, Books, Book, Book Lover Gift Set, Librarian Gift

$46.00

Wait, wait – you’re telling me I can have not one, but THREE mysteriously stained books for only $46.00???

For the lazy librarian

Coasting- The Lazy Librarian’s Guide To ‘Work’

$2.69

Actually, I bet this one is pretty funny.

For the librarian who needs some time alone

When I Think About Books I Touch My Shelf – Funny Book Club Stemless Wine Glass Gifts for Librarians & Readers

$15.16

For the librarian who might like books too much

Antisocial Enamel Pin

$7.20

For the librarian who wants to shush people, but in a creepy way

Papercraft 3d, Paper trophy, Low poly papercraft, Library decor

$16.04

“He shushed me, and then disappeared into the wall.”

It’s the library equivalent of this Homer Simpson meme:

For the librarian who needs a mug

Public library Davenport Iowa cup

$10.00

“Siri, what’s the best way to sell a library mug on Etsy?”

“Tipped on its side on a paper plate.”

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About Travis Jonker

Travis Jonker is an elementary school librarian in Michigan. He writes reviews (and the occasional article or two) for School Library Journal and is a member of the 2014 Caldecott committee. You can email Travis at scopenotes@gmail.com, or follow him on Twitter: @100scopenotes.

Comments

  1. I *really* want to use Slugface Binbrain as an insult now.

  2. This is a riot! Fortunately, all of the librarians I know are far from insufferable . . . but I did enjoy your Etsy-inspired suggestions. Happy Holidays and may you NEVER receive any of these in your stocking!

  3. Dana Frank says:

    I love this! If I had a nickel for every time I ask a student to use their elbow I could afford that “no coughing” pin!

  4. My wish is that no librarian (including you and me) will be gifted with any of these “insufferable” gifts! Too funny!

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