Books in the Year 3001
What will the future hold for books? Let’s turn the clock forward, to the year 3001:
The Newbery, Caldecott, and other ALA Youth Media Awards will be decided by internet vote.
A hearty congratulations to the 3001 Caldecott medal winner:
I Spy: Cats Wearing Cowboy Hats 12.
Newbery medal honors will go to:
Light-Up Magic Fairy Sparkle Horse: Poop Edition (Earrings Included).
People will no longer skip to the end of books – they’ll time travel there!
The ease and widespread use of time travel will allow readers to spoil the ending of a book they actually read cover to cover.
Books won’t just feed your mind – they will literally feed you!
The DiGornio Book of Pizza, created entirely out of the popular food, will dominate the top of the bestseller list in 3001. Fruit Rollups: Unrolled (Book #1 of the Fruit Snack Quadrilogy) will also make waves.
Storytime will still take place: with robots!
While robots will lead the storytimes of the future, we still will not have figured out how to change their voices from a grating, flat monotone, making read aloud time a completely joyless experience. Hey, at least people don’t have to do it!
Ebooks? Old news. Tbooks? Now you’re talking!
In 3001, People will be using their outdated Kindles as fancy utensils for serving lasagna. :Thought books” will be all the rage, even taking over the board book market. Bestselling Tboardbooks will include Look at That Ceiling Fan! and What Does This Taste Like?
Following Web 2.0 trends, all picture books will allow for reader-created text.
“Let the wild rumpus start”?, so 30th century. In the year 3001, technology will allow readers to substitute that famous line from the children’s classic Where the Wild Things Are with the much more attention grabbing “BOUT 2 GET CRAZY IN HERE!!!!!!!!”.
Books will become very, very small.
It is inevitable that advances in nanotechnology in the year 3001 will allow us to create books that are tiny. Smaller, in fact, than is visible to the human eye. Special tools will be created to turn pages and read the text. Bifocals will give way to heavy, knob-bedecked “microscopals”. Printing presses, once the size of large rooms, will fit into very, very small rooms.
Two words: flying books.
Advances in aviation by the year 3001 will make flight possible for books. Popular books won’t just “fly off the shelves”, they will fly off the shelves. Trips to the library and bookstore will become terrifying experiences reminiscent of Alfred Hitchcock’s The Birds.
‘The Future‘ http://www.flickr.com/photos/64519085@N00/723987842
‘October 31‘ http://www.flickr.com/photos/73129239@N00/2080562077
‘have you ever seen a unicorn?‘ http://www.flickr.com/photos/19696550@N04/2439468135
‘Time Reloaded‘ http://www.flickr.com/photos/29638083@N00/3093287432
‘VICTRON a.k.a. Slim‘ http://www.flickr.com/photos/32601210@N06/3321218504
‘What was I thinking?‘ http://www.flickr.com/photos/34656539@N00/730800562
‘NaNoWriMo 2007 – Day 2‘ http://www.flickr.com/photos/80134839@N00/1839579166
‘Wee books‘ http://www.flickr.com/photos/14456531@N07/1471885521
‘The Birds‘ http://www.flickr.com/photos/8211018@N03/3574893575
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About Travis Jonker
Travis Jonker is an elementary school librarian in Michigan. He writes reviews (and the occasional article or two) for School Library Journal and is a member of the 2014 Caldecott committee. You can email Travis at email@example.com, or follow him on Twitter: @100scopenotes.
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