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Children's Lit Commish: 'All Books Will Actually Just Be Videos By 2012'

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The following is a work of fiction.

The Children’s Literature Commissioner announced today that by the year 2012, all books released for children will be videos.

Before a packed audience of assembled press, the Commissioner came across as a defeated man. Appearing 45 minutes late, and foregoing his usual suit and tie for sweatpants, he had this to say:

“Hey, we’re living in the 21st century, are we not? In case you haven’t noticed, the “Information Superhighway” has won. As of 2012, all newly published children’s “books” will actually just be videos.”

In an attempt to calm the stunned reaction of those in attendance, the Commissioner added,

“Don’t worry, there will still be books. Yes, I am one of the few who still hold onto the opinion that books will never die. It’s just that those books will be videos, or “books on screen” as I now demand they be called.”

Citing the popularity of “that one video where the diet coke sprays everywhere”, the Commissioner encouraged the public to see this as a positive step.

“Look, it’s for the best. Would you rather have your children read an adventure story, or watch an adventure story starring an awesome actor? Oh yeah, and P.S.? The actor’s name rhymes with Shteven Shegal.”

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About Travis Jonker

Travis Jonker is an elementary school librarian in Michigan. He writes reviews (and the occasional article or two) for School Library Journal and is a member of the 2014 Caldecott committee. You can email Travis at scopenotes@gmail.com, or follow him on Twitter: @100scopenotes.

Comments

  1. I will share this with my students. While they seem to like when their favorite books are made into movies, I think they prefer the books. The notable exception seems to be Harry Potter, which is daunting for some students who don’t really like fantasy. At least they can keep up with their peers by watching the movie.

    Enjoyed this. Thanks for sharing.

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  3. Scope Notes says:

    I couldn’t tell for sure from your comments but I would just like to state for the record that this post is a work of fiction. I was trying to be funny here – many apologies if I caused any confusion

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